'We would have done anything'

Don’t let those who sadly take their own lives every year become mere statistics. That was the cogent message from a Muff family, when speaking to The Anglo-Celt at the presentation of over €17,000 to SOSAD recently, the proceeds of a truck run in Mickey Carolan’s memory.
Michael Carolan (29), beloved son and brother, took his own life on June 6 earlier this year.

His sister Grace McKenna said his untimely passing “was completely like a bolt out of the blue” for his devastated family and friends. “Never for a second did we think Mickey would entertain the idea of suicide,” she said.
Grace described him as a fun-loving guy and a great mimic of accents who loved Irish comedy. “When you would walk into mammy’s kitchen, Mickey would have the tears running down your face with laughter. He had an uncanny ability to recycle funny bits from Kilnaskully and Pat Shortt. He was always in good form,” she recalled.
“He would walk into a room and light up the place. As soon as he appeared, the craic would start”, she continued, adding that Michael always immediately responded to the call when family members wanted help. “It did not matter how big or small the job was.”
Now, on reflection, Grace advises families: “If you think somebody is down in themselves, just ask them are they alright? Honestly, look them in the eyes and ask them, don’t just say ‘are you alright’ and they go, ‘I’m grand’ and move on.”
Michael’s brother Patrick is still struggling to process what happened. “I am getting into the habit of sitting calmly by myself – I let the tears come – it is important to let yourself do that, it is important to let it bubble up and over flow. Take half an hour a day to feel what you are feeling and to be comfortable with it. It is the best way to move forward,” he revealed.

Reach out

Patrick is appealing to those who may feel depressed or have suicidal thoughts to reach out to organisations like SOSAD. “That first phone call you make to SOSAD could save your life. “It could start a process that might save you and get you out of whatever rut you might be in.”
Michael’s mother Nina also urges people to talk about their feelings. “It does not matter if you are going to shock them – say if you have a problem. We would have done anything if we had known what was going to happen – the message is for sons to talk to their parents, their sisters or brothers.”
Her husband Paddy described his son Mickey as and “all rounder”. “He was the man about town and the life of the party and he liked fishing and shooting and he was multi-talented.”
Along with Grace, one of Michael’s best friends, Dwayne Lynch, were the chief organisers of the successful trunk and vintage run fundraiser for SOSAD, which raised €17,330 for the organisation and was presented recently in the Wishing Well in Kingscourt.
They event was staged on September 10 last, which was Mickey’s birthday, and ironically the family later learned that this particular date was ‘Worldwide Suicide Prevention Day’.
Dwayne said that between trucks, tractors, cars and motorbikes, over 300 vehicles took part in the run, which took off from the town of Kingscourt.
“We organised for the convoy of vehicles to do a lap of Kingscourt and, because it was World Suicide Prevention day, we wanted to make an impact in the community – let people know that there is help and support out there.”
The convoy went out by Muff and passed by Mickey’s home place and then headed for Carrickmacross, Ardee, Woodtown, Nobber, Kilmainhamwood, where they linked up with the tractors and they complete convoy came back into Kingscourt to their base at the Community Centre where refreshments were enjoyed and a monster raffle took place.
Mickey worked for Toners Transport in Gyproc Saint Gobain and as a lorry mechanic in Owen’s Transport on Saturdays.
 He also enjoyed working with Eugene Hughes Silage Contractor and helped his father Paddy on the farm when he could. The convoy passed by all these places.
Christine Wynne from SOSAD said she was “absolutely blown away” by the cheque amounting to €17,330. “It just shows what can be achieved by the power of people coming together – support both financially and emotionally – it will keep the doors open for a long time to come.”
“We had fun times together – he may be gone, but the memories live on,” reflected Dwayne of his deceased friend.

*The family wish to thank Clifford Kelly for organising the use of the Community Centre for the occasion free of charge. They would also like to thank Aisling McMahon in the Wishing Well Bar, those who assisted in organising the event and to all who gave so generously in support.