Bereaved Dad begs young drivers to be careful

Seamus Enright

Published: Wed 12 Mar 2014, 7:28 PM

The father of a Cavan girl, who died as a result car crash in which the driver was almost two-and-a-half times over the legal limit, has made an empassioned plea to young drivers to “think... be careful... act with care... and be sensible”. The poignant comments came from Joseph McCabe by way of a victim impact statement at the sentencing of the young man in the case.

Jake Crean (21) of Aghnasheagh, Mountnugent, pleaded guilty to dangerous driving causing the death of his former girlfriend, Joanne McCabe, near her east Cavan home on July 21, 2012. The court also heard, in evidence, the vehicle they were travelling in was so modified in order to boost performance it rendered it unsuitable for use on Irish roads.
Before Judge Pauline Codd at Cavan Circuit Court last week, Crean also pleaded guilty to drunk driving on the same occasion (for full details of case, see page 7).
Mr McCabe told the court that on the day his daughter was born: “Joanne was placed in my arms for the first time as she took her first breath of life.” He was there too when she passed away on the roadside outside his own father’s house where they had pulled Joanne’s lifeless body from the upturned Honda Civic.
“I fought hard to save her and I was there when she took her last breath. I whispered 'I love you’ for the last time and my precious baby girl was gone. There for her first breath and there for her last breath,” he told the court.
Having previously mourned the loss his wife two years earlier, he described the strength of their four daughters as giving him the will to live on. “They supported each other and are a huge support to me. They were and are my life.”
On the evening before the accident, “as dads always do” he warned Joanne to be careful. Her last words to him were, “See you in the morning”.
“What I witnessed on the road the morning of Joanne’s accident will stay with me forever,” he said. “No father and indeed no human should ever have to witness the carnage I saw, the efforts I made to save my dying child. I cannot find the words to tell you how her death has impacted on my life. There really are no words to describe the pain, the despair and the disbelief.”
He again paid tribute to his daughters as being “my rock and my future and I love them beyond words. I wish I had told Joanne that more often too.”
Mr McCabe told Jake Crean that he knew what happened was an accident.
“You are hurting too,” he told him.
“It’s a tragedy for you too. Joanne would not want you to hurt. I hope you find peace of mind and heart and remember that’s what she would have wanted.”
Mr McCabe earned plaudits from the presiding Judge Codd for what he said next, describing him as a person of “exceptionally strong character” with a “remarkable” level of forgiveness.“I wanted my impact statement to serve a purpose,” Mr McCabe told the open court. “This purpose is to ask, beg and plead with all young people to drive slow, to be careful, and to be sensible before taking the wheel. I heard many statements in the past and read many papers where parents describe their hurt, their anger and their disbelief following an accident and the loss of a loved one. I never thought it would be me.

“Every day I think of Joanne, every hour I pray to her to give me strength and every minute I am reminded she is gone. My heart is broken beyond repair. I will never see her married or share in her future happiness. Her sisters miss her and live with a pain that I cannot heal or take away for them, like a father is supposed to. Jake and his parents had their world ripped apart. There are no winners.
“All it took on that night was one bad decision, one big mistake, one moment of stupidness. Drink, speed or whatever the reason, I beg everyone listening to this to...think...to be careful...to act with care...to be sensible.”
Responding, Judge Codd told Mr McCabe: “No doubt Joanne was lucky to have you as a father.”

Road fatalities

Mr McCabe’s comments come just weeks after the first road fatality to occur in the Cavan-Monaghan Garda District this year.
Gardaí are continuing their investigation after a 4 x 4 vehicle was discovered at the bottom of an embankment on the N12 at Tyholland last month. The man, who was on his own, was pronounced dead at the scene.
To date, in 2014, there have been 184 accidents recorded in the District, 85 of which have occurred in Cavan.
It compares to 2013, when over the course of 12 months, some 11 persons died as a result of road traffic accidents in the region, three of which were in County Cavan.
In total, there were 1,179 accidents recorded, five in which the occupants travelling in the county suffered serious injury.

FULL STATEMENT FROM JOSEPH MCCABE:

My name is Joseph McCabe and I am the Father of Joanne McCabe.
On December 27th 1991, Joanne was placed in my arms for the first time as she took her first breath of life. She was precious, her face and skin were flawless. I whispered “I love you” for the first time and we proudly called our third daughter Joanne after myself.
Joanne’s sudden death has had a profound effect on all members of our family. To try to articulate the impact that Joanne’s death has had for all of us is truly a difficult and an overwhelming challenge. There are no words to express the harrowing pain, distress and loss we all feel on a daily basis.
On 21st July 2012 I got a phone call, come quick Joanne has had an accident. Just two miles from home and opposite her Grandparents house. I was there in seconds. Nothing could have prepared me for what I saw. With the help of my 82 year old Father and my younger brother - we tried to get a pulse from her lifeless body in an upside down car. I done CPR, I fought hard to save her and I was there when she took her last breath. I whispered “I love you” for the last time and my precious baby girl was gone. There for her first breath and there for her last breath.
My four precious daughters lost their Mother suddenly and tragically just two years earlier. My wife died in August 2009. A tough blow but my daughters gave me the will to live on. They supported each other and are a huge support to me. They were and are my life.
Joanne worked in Mergon in Castlepollard. She loved her job and her work colleagues. She got her summer holidays that day. She was full of life, very hard working, easy going but very thoughtful and considerate beyond her years. She was deep thinking and suffered the loss of her Mum quietly but painfully. She was loved by all who met her and touched the lives of many during her short few years. This was reflected at her funeral. To say she was beautiful would be an understatement. Her beauty was inside and out. She was and always will be our lovely Joanne.
That evening of Friday, July 20, started out like any other. Two of my daughters getting ready for a night out. She kissed me fondly and said “I’m off out now”. I checked that she was ok for money and that she had her phone. I warned her to be careful as Dad’s always do and she said “see you in the morning”. Her last words.
What I witnessed on the road the morning of Joanne’s accident will stay with me forever. No father and indeed no human should ever have to witness the carnage I saw, the efforts I made to save my dying child. I cannot find the words to tell you how her death has impacted on my life. There really are no words to describe the pain, the despair and the disbelief. I lost my rest and my peace; I have trouble finding joy in the simple pleasures of life. Being happy doesn’t seem right any more. My girls Clara, Rachel and Corinne had their world shattered once more. I would like to acknowledge that they are the strongest girls I know, they are my rock and my future and I love them beyond words. I wish I had told Joanne that more often too.
I would also like to say to Jake, who was driving the car in which Joanne was killed, I know it was an accident and I know you are hurting too. Joanne always spoke well of you and I know you get consolation in knowing that she was fond of you and she made no secret of that to us.
It’s a tragedy for you too. Joanne would not want you to hurt. I hope you find peace of mind and heart and remember that’s what she would have wanted.
I’d like to acknowledge Paula, Jake’s Mother; you were like a second Mum to Joanne. She was always made welcome in your home and both you and Jonathan were good to her. Thank you.
I wanted my impact statement to serve a purpose. This purpose is to ask, beg and plead with all young people to drive slow, to be careful, and to be sensible before taking the wheel. I heard many statements in the past and read many papers where parents describe their hurt, their anger and their disbelief following an accident and the loss of a loved one. I never thought it would be me.
Every day I think of Joanne, every hour I pray to her to give me strength and every minute I am reminded that she is gone. My heart is broken beyond repair. I will never see her married or share in her future happiness. Her sisters miss her and live with a pain that I cannot heal or take away for them, like a father is supposed to. Jake and his parents had their world ripped apart. There are no winners.
All it took on that night was one bad decision, one big mistake, one moment of stupidness. Drink, speed or whatever the reason, I beg everyone listening to this to...THINK...TO BE CAREFUL...TO ACT WITH CARE...TO BE SENSIBLE.
The only way to have a friend is to be one.
Don’t let Joanne’s death be in vain. I pray no-one else ever suffers what I am suffering. Keep me and my daughters in your prayers always and never take those you love for granted.
Thank you,
Joe